Friday, September 25, 2009

My Dad and I

I spoke to my Dad last week. He said i looked haggard and gained weight. I told him because i spent so much money on food and enjoying that's why i gained weight. His rebuttal was that i'm covering what i'm actually suffering. He knows that i'll work late into the nights, strive for excellence while sacrificing sleep and health. He knows that i'll push my limits to the max, and push it even further. And it's all true. He has never pressured me into getting top honours. He never asked me to bring home exam results with top distinctions even once.

'As long as you pass, get promoted to the next level. That is all i ask for...'

After a point in time where i didn't do that, he still believed in me. He understood that i wasted that one year in life. And he told me that wasting one year compared to wasting your entire life is worth it. From that point onwards, i've always studied real hard. Put in effort in everything i did. And i ended up being the top Normal Academic student for my 'O' levels. It is nothing boast about but i knew i pushed myself hard so as to make him proud.

When it was time for my national service, his first advice was telling me to take a step back if i cannot achieve what i want.

'No point "chiong-ing" and end up losing your life.'

Till date, i still remember that sentence. But, i never listen... I pushed hard, i went all the way. At times, i was at the brink of death. But i guess when you had so many brushes wtih death, you are just not that afraid anymore...

As i return back to student life, i decided to push my limits again to the next level. By studying overseas and living outside my comfort zone, i'm going to learn to survive on my own. Cook my own meals, wash my own laundry and plan my own finances.

'If at any point of time, you think that you cannot take it anymore. Just return home.'

I've never thought of returning home without a degree. I've never even thought what would happen if i did. I pushed myself to achieve the grades i want. I'll never return home empty handed.

As we chatted last week, he told me that a degree is not the most important thing in life. What is important is our choices we make in life and what we do in life. Yes, the certificate is important but all it does is gives you a stepping stone to where you want to be.

'There are successful people who doesn't even hold a degree certificate and is currently holding key positions in their organisations.'

My reply was this...

Dad, of the past 24 years... Have i ever listened to you? Have i ever taken your advice and give up? Have i ever just passed and move on with life? You should know how stubborn your son can be. And to return home, after so much time, so much money spent and so much hardship on both physical and emotional, without a degree with my name on it? Dad, if you think i'm gonna return home empty handed, than i think you don't know me well enough.

At that point, my dad just stared at me and smiled.

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